I know that some of you want to know what's been going on, and why I haven't been getting into details. Now, I'm ready to explain.

Well, a while back, maybe around April, I found out that Dave had been cheating on me with a girl he had JUST met! So, we broke up, but later that night he called me crying and apologizing. A few days later, I had forgiven him, and we were back together. About a week after things were back to normal, we started to argue like CRAZY. He'd never answer his phone, and he'd always be in a bad mood. He never wanted to see me, and he wouldn't let me come over. I then accused him of cheating on me with the same girl, but he just kept denying it. I remember telling him that if he's cheating on me, he should confess now, because I'll find out later. And what do you know?!? I caught him! Through Facebook...! He had pictures of him and this new girl hugging, and saying how much he loved her, and that they were dating. I couldn't believe it. The SAME girl! He never even broke up with her! He was dating and fucking the both of us at the same damn time! I couldn't breathe. I couldn't speak! I couldn't even cry. My heart felt like it had been shattered! I loved him so much and I gave my all in our relationship, and he just ruthlessly played with my heart like some kind of toy! I thought about all those moments we had together. All the times I thought that he was really in love! And I became angry at myself for falling for him, and wasting my time. For sacrificing all that I have for him! I felt stupid. Like a fool. My mom had to talk to me to calm me down. Thank god for her, or I would've gone to his place and beat the shit out of him.

I also found out that he had sex with a friend of mine immediately before him and I had started dating. He never told me about her. I even asked if they've done anything, and he told me no. He had even recorded it, and showed it to his buddies. Yep. He's the devil in diguise. He also showed his friends a video of him and the new girl having sex. She doesn't know about it though, and I don't plan on telling her. There are also MANY other girls that I don't know about. Really have no interest in knowing anyway. I know him well enough already. A new lie revealed isn't going to change a thing.

When I found out that David was cheating on me with this new girl, I informed her. Of course she didn't believe me. She called me a "lying little bitch", and accused me of being jealous of what she has. So, whatever, I'll just let her find out the hard way.

I loved him so much. To the brink of obsession. I was crazy about him. I would've done anything for him. When I look back at how loyal I was to him, it makes me feel PATHETIC! Sometimes, I wish that I could take it all back, but I know that it's only going to make me stronger for the next heartbreak. Which is part of the reason I don't want to risk being in love again. I know that my heart is going to be broken again. My situation may seem bad now, but the next case will be even worse. I'm afraid. Not only that I'll have my heart broken, but that I'll break someone else's heart.

I'm in no place to be in a relationship with anyone at the moment. I don't feel like myself. I'm still hurting, and I'll only take it out on the guy that I'm dating. Everyday, it's getting better though. I told someone, "These past few days have been really hard, but with each day, I reach a higher level of happiness every time a low strikes me". This is true. I'm trying my best to cheer up, and I want to be happy more than anything, but it's going to take time.

Now, it's time to get down to business! Being in love has forced me to put a few things on the back burner; but no more! I'm getting back to my busy self!